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    January 29

    同学聚会(郁闷ing)

          这是我走进大学的第一年,在过去的半年里我曾经很多次的怀念我逝去的高三,怀念曾经一度成为了我生活的主要课题,记得在暑假结束的时候,高中的同学就已经开始计划寒假里的聚会,那时侯大家仿佛对这个聚会都充满了向往,我也是一样,一直想象这次聚会会是怎样一个情景,天南海北的人重新聚集到一起,谈起曾经一起经历过的岁月,会是怎样的心情。在最后复习的那段日子里,聚会甚至成为了我最期待的东西,成为了支持我走下去的最坚强的支柱。
          然而现在我回来了,当大家再次提起这个聚会时,我觉得我的心情没有像我想象的那样兴奋,甚至我都已经不想去了,也许我们大家都变了,不同的环境造就我们现在不同的性格,那么多人再次聚到一起也许只是一种形式,大家都只是为了实践当初的诺言,本来作为释放感情的工具的聚会也就变成了一种任务,我们只是在完成任务。
          不知道是谁在花这个精力去组织这样一个聚会,据说还把全班人都喊到了。一直以来我都认为人越是多,气氛就越是不对,反而不如几个死党一起玩一场,闹一场,这么正式的活动只会增进大家的隔膜。我有点不想去了。。。
          可是我又怕我后悔,毕竟那里承载了我最珍贵的回忆,这半年里我大半的时间都是活在这样的回忆里,我不希望失去这一个(也许是最后一个)走近它的机会,但我又怕这次的聚破坏以前的生活在我心里的形象,那样我就连最后一点想象的空间都没有了。。。

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